Anastasia discovers her tongue :)

Silly, pretty and endearing ...

Thank - full

I have been overwhelmed for the last few days thinking what a miracle my baby is ... For those of you who don't know it, we went through a really rough time with her after she was born, because she had grade III intra-ventricular haemorrhage. It most often happens in preemies but can also happen as a result of long or traumatic birth. I have often blamed myself and the doctors for letting me be in labor for 28 hours after my water broke, it was hard on me, it must have been so hard on her! After we found out that she has had bleeding in her brain ventricles we were floored, as well as her doctors, and scared of what it might mean. I remember being extremely upset, my hormones were still raging post-partum, I was so scared for my baby, hurt from watching her having to undergo all those invasive tests, feeling like such a bad testimony because I couldn't stop crying ... And then, when they took her in for a CAT scan, Brent went with her, and I remember just collapsing onto my knees on the floor of the little cold waiting room and just screaming on the inside to God, "PLEASE, PLEASE, DON'T TAKE MY BABY! PLEASE LET HER BE OK!" , and at that moment I suddenly felt relieved, not completely at peace, but calmer and much stronger, and when God gave me the assurance that Anastasia was going to be fine, more then just ok, that she was going to be perfect. I just knew it in my heart. All the complications that could have happened with her extensive bleeding (hydrocephalus. cerebral palsy, other kinds of traumatic brain injury, so many things that just make my stomach churn) never happened. They even referred us to a developmental specialist to monitor her progress but they ended up never having to come because Anastasia not only hit her milestones, she is way ahead of the average on most of them. She started walking at 9 months, she is bilingual, she is so intelligent and strong that sometimes I forget how different things could have been for her. I work with special needs people, and seeing the challenges that they are faced with every day has made me acutely aware of the fact that she could have been on the receiving end of these services. I am humbled and so thankful to God for healing our little girl and for the amazing joy that she brings to our lives every day!

And I am back

World News:

• Russia starts an experiment : several men are going to be confined to a small space mimicking a space station for almost 18 months to test if humans can withstand the amount of isolation and closed space that it will take to make an actual expedition to Mars.
• an experimental vaccine has been developed that has been very effective in preventing breast cancer in mice. Studies are due to start on women but even if they are successful, the actual vaccine won't be available to public until at least ten years from now.
• Oil is still leaking into Louisiana waters.

Anastasia is sleeping a lot today. She is getting over another bout with teething/stomach flu/whatever it is. She gets high fever and nausea/vomiting for about 48 hours and then feels better, and both times she had it coincided with her cutting teeth. She still refuses to eat today but at least she is keeping down what I was able to get into her. The key is keeping her entertained and distracted because she gets very cranky if we just sit at home.

WARNING: do not read this part of the post if you are easily grossed out.
Occasionally, I get these stubborn pimples that start deep under the skin and take forever to heal. Well, I got one of those this week and it's been driving me crazy, but I guess I didn't realise exactly how conspicuous it was until Anastasia asked me "Chto eto?" ("What is this?") and pointed at it. See, we have this game where she points to my eyes, nose, mouth, etc., and I name it. My daughter in her innocence thought that I had grown a new body part overnight!

Now for the cuter, non-gross Anastasia stuff.  Her adventures are too many to recount, but here are a couple recent ones. The other day we were at Grandma's house sitting in the living room, and Anastasia went to her diaper bag, got out two diapers, a package of wipes and gave them to me. Then she brought over her life-size baby doll. She wanted me to change its diaper! I must say, my baby really digs this diaper-changing stuff. Sometimes she lets me know that she needs changed. She calls clean diapers "la-la-la-la" (Elmo's song - there are Sesame Street characters on her Pampers), and the dirty ones are "kaka" (Russian vernacular for "poop"). After I change her, I ask her to throw away the dirty diaper and she goes and puts it in the trash. She is only 13 months! I enjoy being able to communicate with her and see how well she understands!

And just one more cute thing she did the other day:
I was going to give Harley some water and was explaining to Anastasia that the kitty was very, very thirsty. She went and got her sippy cup and put it in front of the cat. Then she thought about it, turned around, and brought over her other sippy cup! She assessed the situation and decided that one cup might not be enough since the kitty was VERY thirsty.

ONLY ONE MONTH LEFT UNTIL ANASTASIA AND ME LEAVE FOR RUSSIA! I am extremely happy but also have a lot of anxiety about this trip, for reasons I might write about later. The daughter is up and it's tie to go to the Zoo!